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When should I use du and when Sie in German?

3 min readPublished 9 October 2026

Short answer

Use Sie with adults you do not know, in shops and offices, with officials, doctors and most people in professional roles, and with older people. Use du with friends, family, children, animals, classmates and — increasingly — colleagues and people your own age in informal settings. When you are unsure, start with Sie and let the other person offer du.

Sie is always written with a capital S and takes the same verb form as sie (they): Können Sie mir helfen?

The grammar of du and Sie

du (informal)Sie (formal)
to bedu bistSie sind
to havedu hastSie haben
to comedu kommstSie kommen
yourdein BuchIhr Buch
to youdirIhnen
you (object)dichSie
imperativeKomm!Kommen Sie!

  • Hast du Zeit?

    Do you have time?

    du

  • Haben Sie Zeit?

    Do you have time?

    Sie

  • Kannst du mir helfen?

    Can you help me?

    du

  • Können Sie mir helfen?

    Can you help me?

    Sie

For several people you address informally, use ihr: Habt ihr Zeit? For several people formally, Sie stays the same.

Who offers “du”

Traditionally, the person who is older, more senior, or the woman (in older etiquette) offers du: Wollen wir uns duzen? (Shall we say du?) or Sag ruhig du (Feel free to say du). Once du is agreed, going back to Sie would sound cold or even hostile.

Among young people, students and people in sport, hobbies and many online spaces, du is often used from the first moment without any formal offer.

At work

Practice varies by company and sector:

  • Traditional companies, public offices, law, medicine: Sie, often combined with the surname: Frau Becker, haben Sie kurz Zeit?
  • Start-ups, tech, creative industries: du is common across all levels.
  • Mixed: du within a team, Sie with customers and senior management.

When you start a new job, listen for a few days — or ask a colleague what is usual.

Regional and situational differences

In Austria and Switzerland, the patterns are broadly similar, with local nuances. Shops and brands sometimes use du in advertising to sound friendly. In emails, Sehr geehrte Frau Becker (formal) and Liebe Frau Becker or Hallo Frau Becker (less formal, still with Sie) are common openings.

Common mistakes

  • Not: Kannst Sie mir helfen?

    Better: Können Sie mir helfen?

  • Not: Können sie mir helfen? (to one person, in writing)

    Better: Können Sie mir helfen?

    lowercase sie means “they” or “she”

  • Not: Haben Sie dein Ticket?

    Better: Haben Sie Ihr Ticket?

  • Not: Danke dir, Herr Weber.

    Better: Danke Ihnen, Herr Weber.

    a surname with Herr/Frau almost always goes with Sie

  • Not: Switching between du and Sie with the same person.

    Better: Keep one form until it is changed by agreement.

A safe strategy for learners

  1. Use Sie with adults until they suggest du.
  2. Use du with children, friends and people who use du with you in a relaxed setting.
  3. Learn both verb forms from the start — you will need Sie for official life and du for social life.

In short

  • Sie: formal, capitalised, plural verb form; Ihr, Ihnen.
  • du: informal; dein, dir, dich; plural ihr.
  • Start with Sie; the other person usually offers du.
  • Workplaces differ — listen first, then match.

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